[ Almost bargaining like he's in court aiming for the lightest sentence, but there is no judge. Just someone raw and confused and looking for answers. ]
Why didn't you try to stop Teacher?
I'm mad but I'm a lot of other things too.
[ He cried all during the battle, berserker tears filled with blood. He cries while searching for the missing. He cries so easily. ]
he's always kept his cards close to his chest — we didn't actually know what he had planned, either, even though it seemed pretty predictable;
he's been here longer than we have, and so in theory he ought to have been able to have done a lot more research, in order to actually know what the hell he was doing;
we were doing something, even before his blow landed, which is why the entire ship, and everyone on it, didn't just get swallowed up immediately; too many wards, made out of my brother's blood and will, to let it sink into oblivion.
have you ever tried to stop the sun in its course?
You walked away when he said what he was gonna do. Smoked a cigarette.
Ultimately I can't blame anyone in a hostage situation for not acting. I'm the only one who swears to protect everyone.
[ If being considered a hostage by a kid only a fraction of his age rankles Augustine's pride, Midoriya doesn't care. ]
I just want to know why you used your power on everything but Teacher. I don't want excuses. I want to understand.
[ Not accept, because he can never accept that level of disregard for life, but he has been trying to understand more. He has been wondering, over the months, if understanding more might mean less physical altercations like the chaos on the beach. ]
[ Sigh. Some battles, Alfred reminds himself, aren't worth fighting, or aren't worth fighting right then — his energy and efforts are a little more needed elsewhere, right now. ]
i honestly don't know enough about your powers to make a fair comparison, son kiddo — but augie can't use necromancy against the one who gave it to him, without god deciding to allow whatever it is to affect him.
as for me? i did — on the beach, rather than the boat, yeah. i didn't see a point in making a fuss over the execution when it had been pretty obvious from the casting-off that someone was gonna die to start the thanergy reaction. quite frankly i'd just been glad when we got attacked, since that meant nobody on board was going to be asked to volunteer.
[ Because that, of course, was the only horror still missing from the day's events: the idea that Teacher would have turned to his house, his family and his students, and asked them so earnestly to decide which among them would make that (assuredly temporary!) sacrifice, in the interests of scientific and magical discovery. ]
at some point when we aren't about to do some seriously self-sacrificial bullshit i really do need to talk to you about scalability and self-care, though, and how you're going to burn out and/or get yourself killed if you're always trying to protect everyone. possibly by someone who's offended at your attempts to protect them; possibly by something you're protecting someone from — priorities, too
[ He wasn't aware necromancy could be given, but John did go around calling himself God... He doesn't ask if it was given via knowledge, the prohibition against hurting one's teacher entirely in the mind, or some more magical way (like a Quirk can be, defying all known science). ]
Just everyone in front of me. I know there are people I can't reach. Someone on the other side of the city is probably in danger right now.
You don't prioritize lives like I do, both you and Augustine-san. I thought we could fight side by side
Lecturing me on being self-sacrificial when you're about to go do something sounds like my old mentor. That's not sustainable. Dying isn't going to make amends. You need to live. It's harder but you need to live. What are you doing You need to live. Please live.
after ten thousand years, neither of us is in any hurry to die, kiddo. especially when this is the first time we've gotten to have regularly-scheduled decent conversations with each other.
sometimes you really are the only one in the position to act, or the only one who knows what to do; sometimes it isn't about scale, so much as it is that you can protect a lot more people if you wrap the shield around the weapon, instead of trying to put it in front of everyone the weapon could strike.
and yeah, i realize it's pretty ironic to have a snake lecture you that it isn't about scales. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
[ Augustine's at the door, now; this is the last chance to turn back, except that they can't turn back, and neither of them thinks otherwise. Whatever happens to them on the other side of the Doorway, they'll be there together. ]
[ He's got a bad feeling about all this and he doesn't have time to unpack ten. thousand. years. But he will. ]
You make it sound like you're jumping on a grenade. Or Augustine-san is. I don't know what can actually happen to Omens exactly.
Back home I thought I could do everything on my own once and I learned it didn't work. You two don't have to be like that. I don't know if I can trust you but Please call me if you need help.
[ He feels like he keeps saying this, but how many people listen? Some do... but not enough. ]
[ This next reply doesn't show up for a very long time — a gap stretching from earliest-evening of the 8th until later-afternoon of the 9th. ]
no actual grenades involved, kiddo — just the choice to enter into, shall we say, some very ... binding ... arbitration
all three of us will be fine, and this is going to help speed that up
so's the way a friend of mine from about a myriad back showed up a little earlier this afternoon, to take turns babysittingwatching babysitting
how old are you, again? i really do appreciate your offer of help, and honestly i hope at some point circumstances align so we can take you up on it, but also i sincerely hope we never ever ever have a call to ask you to help with what's been going on around here.
[ Thanks for leaving him to an entire night and day of patrol instead of sleep--not that he's had much sleep lately anyway.
Babysitting. One way to wrap a shield around a weapon, perhaps. Augustine is being awfully vague. He does know what grenades are though.
But then Midoriya is asked a direct question. He erases the start of his own reply. ]
Oh I forgot my birthday is soon I'll be 17. Same age as Paul-kun. You said ten thousand years. Were you exaggerating?
[ And then he types the rest of his reply anyway. ]
You really can't just say stuff like that and not expect me to be out all night Heroes are often the first on the scene in my world. If someone seems like they'll be in danger, we're responsible for doing something. Back home, I was in training at school. Not professional yet, but in an emergency, I can act.
oh kiddo, sixteen is far too young to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders! your skeleton is still developing, you'll end up with a hunchback or otherwise stunting your full growth! scoliosis, maybe, just generally not a good look to force on yourself!
how long is your schooling supposed to last, before you become a professional hero?
please remember that — even if you aren't in school here, now, and your school's teachers aren't here (and i don't know that they aren't) — you aren't an adult until you're 26, physiologically speaking; you've got a long way to go yet, and you shouldn't ever have to be the most responsible party in the room/house/town; you almost definitely can find someone else who can take care of a bigger problem than you can handle.
and even if you're absolutely certain that you can handle it, letting those nice responsible adults know you're going to, if it's a problem bigger than, say, cleaning out a kitty litter tray, is either going to get you ready-made backup, or get you praised for handling whatever the problem is.
[ ... and then there's that last, direct question, too. Alfred sighs, with the whole length of himself, keeping it silent so as not to disturb Augustine's hard-won rest. ]
[ It's as Paul said. A myriad. It's an unfathomable number of years. ]
I've got two more years of high school. By graduation we should have gotten our Provisional Hero Licenses. That's what I have now. It allows us to start work under supervision, though in an emergency we can act without instruction. After school, most start working at an agency as a sidekick under a Pro, and test for their regular Hero License. Only then are they full Pro Heroes. Some stay as sidekicks, others start their own agency. That can take any number of years.
That's in times of peace. Things got bad in my world. No one's in school. Everyone's in shelters. Cell towers are going out. There aren't enough Pro Heroes to keep everyone safe. I know what calling for backup means. But I also know I couldn't have let people die in front of me.
What does 10,000 years of knowledge tell you when everything is falling apart, and you're the only ones who can stop it because there is no one else left?
[ He wonders, reading that last bit, if Deku even realizes — ]
it tells us that it's nice to be able to tell someone else when you're about to do something that might save everyone and might just get you killed, but to do so in a way where the people who can't help you do whatever it is won't be able to try, and therefore won't interfere, mess things up, get hurt, or potentially even die in the process.
kind of like how it was actually really great that everyone el most of you had already gotten far away from the house before we went to poke the bear.
i'm awfully sorry that things have gotten that bad in your world, before you came here, but — that's there, not here; whatever species you consider yourself to be where you're from, you're a squid here, kiddo, same as everyone else, at the core of it; you still don't have to be the most responsible person in the whole town, i promise. 🤎
[ The adults were just as lost as the kids. Nothing is worse than discovering they are capable of not only failing to protect and nurture, but also hurting the ones in their charge. Gideon still has not been restored to her body. ]
I'd say things are pretty bad here. I'm more alone here than I was there. I'm in more danger here, and not just because I tried to hit Teacher.
A few days ago I trusted the wrong people. People I know and care about made decisions that would force me to fight them if I'd been able. I did have to fight one of them as a Beast anyway.
I left responsibility with others and it went badly. I miss you both but I don't know if I trust you with the things I care about.
[ With his Corruption screaming save, save, SAVE at him, there is little room for him to entertain his usual charity and trust. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
there were a lot of things we didn't do on the boat
we also did a lot to get people back off the boat again safely, with mixed results
did you want to be more specific about which nothing you're mad at us about?
no subject
[ Almost bargaining like he's in court aiming for the lightest sentence, but there is no judge. Just someone raw and confused and looking for answers. ]
Why didn't you try to stop Teacher?
I'm mad but I'm a lot of other things too.
[ He cried all during the battle, berserker tears filled with blood. He cries while searching for the missing. He cries so easily. ]
no subject
a few things to keep in mind:
he's always kept his cards close to his chest — we didn't actually know what he had planned, either, even though it seemed pretty predictable;
he's been here longer than we have, and so in theory he ought to have been able to have done a lot more research, in order to actually know what the hell he was doing;
we were doing something, even before his blow landed, which is why the entire ship, and everyone on it, didn't just get swallowed up immediately; too many wards, made out of my brother's blood and will, to let it sink into oblivion.
have you ever tried to stop the sun in its course?
no subject
Ultimately I can't blame anyone in a hostage situation for not acting. I'm the only one who swears to protect everyone.
[ If being considered a hostage by a kid only a fraction of his age rankles Augustine's pride, Midoriya doesn't care. ]
I just want to know why you used your power on everything but Teacher. I don't want excuses. I want to understand.
[ Not accept, because he can never accept that level of disregard for life, but he has been trying to understand more. He has been wondering, over the months, if understanding more might mean less physical altercations like the chaos on the beach. ]
no subject
and, again, that was augustine[ Sigh. Some battles, Alfred reminds himself, aren't worth fighting, or aren't worth fighting right then — his energy and efforts are a little more needed elsewhere, right now. ]
i honestly don't know enough about your powers to make a fair comparison,
sonkiddo — but augie can't use necromancy against the one who gave it to him, without god deciding to allow whatever it is to affect him.as for me? i did — on the beach, rather than the boat, yeah. i didn't see a point in making a fuss over the execution when it had been pretty obvious from the casting-off that someone was gonna die to start the thanergy reaction. quite frankly i'd just been glad when we got attacked, since that meant nobody on board was going to be asked to volunteer.
[ Because that, of course, was the only horror still missing from the day's events: the idea that Teacher would have turned to his house, his family and his students, and asked them so earnestly to decide which among them would make that (assuredly temporary!) sacrifice, in the interests of scientific and magical discovery. ]
at some point when we aren't about to do some seriously self-sacrificial bullshit i really do need to talk to you about scalability and self-care, though, and how you're going to burn out and/or get yourself killed if you're always trying to protect everyone. possibly by someone who's offended at your attempts to protect them; possibly by something you're protecting someone from — priorities, too
no subject
Just everyone in front of me. I know there are people I can't reach. Someone on the other side of the city is probably in danger right now.
You don't prioritize lives like I do, both you and Augustine-san.
I thought we could fight side by sideLecturing me on being self-sacrificial when you're about to go do something sounds like my old mentor. That's not sustainable. Dying isn't going to make amends. You need to live. It's harder but you need to live.
What are you doingYou need to live.
Please live.
no subject
sometimes you really are the only one in the position to act, or the only one who knows what to do; sometimes it isn't about scale, so much as it is that you can protect a lot more people if you wrap the shield around the weapon, instead of trying to put it in front of everyone the weapon could strike.
and yeah, i realize it's pretty ironic to have a snake lecture you that it isn't about scales. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
[ Augustine's at the door, now; this is the last chance to turn back, except that they can't turn back, and neither of them thinks otherwise. Whatever happens to them on the other side of the Doorway, they'll be there together. ]
no subject
You make it sound like you're jumping on a grenade. Or Augustine-san is. I don't know what can actually happen to Omens exactly.
Back home I thought I could do everything on my own once and I learned it didn't work. You two don't have to be like that.
I don't know if I can trust you butPlease call me if you need help.
[ He feels like he keeps saying this, but how many people listen? Some do... but not enough. ]
no subject
no actual grenades involved, kiddo — just the choice to enter into, shall we say, some very ... binding ... arbitration
all three of us will be fine, and this is going to help speed that up
so's the way a friend of mine from about a myriad back showed up a little earlier this afternoon, to take turns
babysittingwatchingbabysittinghow old are you, again? i really do appreciate your offer of help, and honestly i hope at some point circumstances align so we can take you up on it, but also i sincerely hope we never ever ever have a call to ask you to help with what's been going on around here.
no subject
Babysitting. One way to wrap a shield around a weapon, perhaps. Augustine is being awfully vague. He does know what grenades are though.
But then Midoriya is asked a direct question. He erases the start of his own reply. ]
Oh I forgot my birthday is soon
I'll be 17. Same age as Paul-kun.
You said ten thousand years. Were you exaggerating?
[ And then he types the rest of his reply anyway. ]
You really can't just say stuff like that and not expect me to be out all nightHeroes are often the first on the scene in my world. If someone seems like they'll be in danger, we're responsible for doing something. Back home, I was in training at school. Not professional yet, but in an emergency, I can act.no subject
oh kiddo, sixteen is far too young to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders! your skeleton is still developing, you'll end up with a hunchback or otherwise stunting your full growth! scoliosis, maybe, just generally not a good look to force on yourself!
how long is your schooling supposed to last, before you become a professional hero?
please remember that — even if you aren't in school here, now, and your school's teachers aren't here (and i don't know that they aren't) — you aren't an adult until you're 26, physiologically speaking; you've got a long way to go yet, and you shouldn't ever have to be the most responsible party in the room/house/town; you almost definitely can find someone else who can take care of a bigger problem than you can handle.
and even if you're absolutely certain that you can handle it, letting those nice responsible adults know you're going to, if it's a problem bigger than, say, cleaning out a kitty litter tray, is either going to get you ready-made backup, or get you praised for handling whatever the problem is.
[ ... and then there's that last, direct question, too. Alfred sighs, with the whole length of himself, keeping it silent so as not to disturb Augustine's hard-won rest. ]
(no, i wasn't.)
vague mha spoilers
I've got two more years of high school. By graduation we should have gotten our Provisional Hero Licenses. That's what I have now. It allows us to start work under supervision, though in an emergency we can act without instruction.
After school, most start working at an agency as a sidekick under a Pro, and test for their regular Hero License. Only then are they full Pro Heroes. Some stay as sidekicks, others start their own agency. That can take any number of years.
That's in times of peace. Things got bad in my world. No one's in school. Everyone's in shelters. Cell towers are going out. There aren't enough Pro Heroes to keep everyone safe. I know what calling for backup means. But I also know I couldn't have let people die in front of me.
What does 10,000 years of knowledge tell you when everything is falling apart, and you're the only ones who can stop it because there is no one else left?
no subject
it tells us that it's nice to be able to tell someone else when you're about to do something that might save everyone and might just get you killed, but to do so in a way where the people who can't help you do whatever it is won't be able to try, and therefore won't interfere, mess things up, get hurt, or potentially even die in the process.
kind of like how it was actually really great that
everyone elmost of you had already gotten far away from the house before we went to poke the bear.i'm awfully sorry that things have gotten that bad in your world, before you came here, but — that's there, not here; whatever species you consider yourself to be where you're from, you're a squid here, kiddo, same as everyone else, at the core of it; you still don't have to be the most responsible person in the whole town, i promise. 🤎
no subject
I'd say things are pretty bad here. I'm more alone here than I was there. I'm in more danger here, and not just because I tried to hit Teacher.
A few days ago I trusted the wrong people. People I know and care about made decisions that would force me to fight them if I'd been able. I did have to fight one of them as a Beast anyway.
I left responsibility with others and it went badly. I miss you both but I don't know if I trust you with the things I care about.
[ With his Corruption screaming save, save, SAVE at him, there is little room for him to entertain his usual charity and trust. ]